Deadpool vs Wolverine: Here's Who Would Win

Updated:

08 Jan 2022

Deadpool vs Wolverine: Here’s Who Would Win.

Deadpool

Maximum Effort

In this corner we have the Merc with a Mouth, the fast talking assassin;he’s foul-mouthed and incredibly impulsive, it’s Deadpool! Once just an average Joe with average dreams, lung cancer threatened to take his life. Enter the dreaded Weapon X program and their slightly unethical experiments. W After the shady, horribly painful “treatments” Wade wasleft horribly disfigured, but able to heal the most grievous wounds. He also gained superhuman strength and incredible agility. Wade Wilson has become the indomitable Deadpool. He’s the antihero of the ages.

The list of powers he brings to the table include:

Mastery over martial arts. Yeah, he’s pretty much a ninja, and he wrecked Iron Fist in hand to hand combat.
Expert marksmanship, he will win the duel for the fair maiden’s hand every time.
An innate resistance to telepathic attacks. Sorry Professor X, you don’t want to tangle with this messed up mind.
Unparalleled healing. “Off with his head.” Go ahead, he can reattach it. Cleave him in two, blow Deadpool into pieces, he will still regenerate whole. “It’s only a flesh wound.”
Extreme agility. “Spiderman who? You mean that bull wrecking the china shop?” Deadpool is more agile than the masked webslinger.
Immortality. Thanos ‘inflicted’ Deadpool with immortality, to keep him from getting too close to Lady Death. Can you say forbidden love triangle?

Wolverine

Beast Wars

And in this corner we have the Man of Mystery, the Beast with the Adamantium Skeleton, Ol' Canucklehead himself, Wolverine! He may hail from the land of maple syrup but all that sugary goodness didn’t temper his temper. He’s as cuddly as a cactus. Like Deadpool he was an experiment of the Weapon X facility, but he already had an exceptional healing ability. Because of his mutant ability, they fused his skeleton with Adamantium. The process left him out of his mind with such pain and rage that he busted out of the facility killing everyone that got in his way. The experiments erased his memories of who he was before, leaving his past and even his age a mystery. Wolverine is a one man wrecking crew, and in his own words, “The best at what I do”.

Wolverine’s powers and abilities include:

Heightened senses. No one can get the jump on Wolverine. He will smell or hear would be assassins before they can surprise him.
Superhuman strength. With the reinforced skeleton, Wolverine can flip cars or break through nearly any material.
Adamantium claws. Three indestructible claws capable of slicing, dicing, and chopping through all your everyday villains. They’re better than Ginsu knives.
Mastery over hand to hand combat and martial arts. Even without the special abilities you don’t want to get into a fistfight with Wolverine.
Resistance to psychic attacks. Not only does Wolverine’s Adamantium skull protect him from concussions, bullets, and flying pots from jilted lovers, but he can shrug off most telepathic attacks.

How the Battle Would Go Down.

Is that the best you got?

And they’re squaring off. Deadpool starts off by using his most infamous ability; his incessant wisecracks to try and get under Logan’s furry hide. “Sticks and stones won’t break my bones, you think words bother me bub? Shut yer yap and fight.”

Deadpool knows he can’t physically take Wolverine down so he uses his impressive agility and myriade array of explosives and ammunitions to keep the Adamantium beast on his toes. Wolverine runs through the onslaught, senses an opening and lops one of Wade’s arms off. “I’ll fight you with one arm behind your back,” Deadpool jeers before he flips, twists, and slides between Wolverine’s legs to reattach his arm.

Now fully whole once again Deadpool goes back on the attack. Blood flies everywhere as both men land blows that would kill mortals, but their innate healing abilities keep up with the carnage.

The epic fight battles on as unkillable behemoth versus regenerative behemoth rages on. It seems that neither of these Weapon X escapees can keep the upper hand for long. Wade never tires while he prances around like a lithe ninja jabbing, cutting flesh, and wounding with his razor sharp tongue. Just when it looks like this battle will go on all night, the Merc with a Mouth runs straight into Wolverine’s claws, impaling himself. But then he taps the beast on the noggin.

Make my day.

“Don’t look down,” Deadpool croones, then slips off the Adamantium claws and takes cover.

Wolverine only has time to blink at the grenade lodged in his belt. It is made to look like Deadpool’s face. Wolverine growls at the red-rimmed eyes looking back at him right before it explodes, sending him flying through the air. Wolverine lands in a crumpled heap of shrapnel and flesh. He isn’t moving. Is this the end of Ol’ Canucklehead?

With his adversary incapacitated, Deadpool delightfully skips over to finish the job. “Aw, did he fall down and go boom?” Deadpool bends down over Wolverine, the familiar ‘SNIKT’ pierces through the top of his head, while the other three claws slice through his ribcage. Wolverine then stretches Wade wide, slicing him into ribbons of spandex and body parts.

Deadpool isn’t dead, he’s immortal, but he is completely incapacitated until he is able to regenerate his body. This carnage will take some time to heal, in the meantime, Wolverine has meaner villains to tend to.

Conclusion

The winner is…Wolverine.

Let’s face it, Wolverine is a master tactician when it comes to fighting, and his indeterminate age gives him possibly centuries of fighting experience, whereas Deadpool is severely impulsive and most times puts his body in severe harm’s way to win a fight. This tactic simply won’t work against Wolverine.

If Deadpool was able to lock Wolverine in an Adamantium barrel full of water, he might be able to drown the Ol’ Canucklehead. Alternately if Deadpool could lure Wolverine into a large enough electromagnet, Deadpool could keep him trapped there indefinitely, but facts are, Wolverine would be able to smell the trap miles away.

Deadpool is invincible though because of the curse Thanos bestowed upon him. In essence, he can't be killed, so if this was a fight to the death there could certainly be a different outcome, though the battle could rage on indefinitely.

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