ELO Hell Ranked: Every League player should know these guys before Ranking
Fellow League players, we are gathered here today to read another awesome article by BestEzrealSEA and give our respects to our fallen brothers who have succumbed to forever quit the game because of #4 and 1. However, for those of you who still play; let’s have a little fun with our list. See if you or anyone you know fits in at least one of these categories.
But first, let’s first be clear. ELO Hell is always perceived to be a low-ranked division’s problem. Little do all of you know that ELO Hell exists in every division except Challenger, as every division, even Diamond (aka Ranked Purgatory), is complete hell and must be escaped by going up to Master and Challenger (aka Ranked Heaven).
Rightly so, Challengers and Masters are always looked upon and feared as Gods most of the time. Fast forward to our list, even Challengers would know all of these players. I would know (if I actually get to Challenger). But that’s not the point at hand, though!
However, let’s be real for a second. We all know that there are different types of LoL players, some are honorable, some are friend-request-worthy, and some are just downright annoying kids who need to see a therapist or at least the end of their fathers’ belt. Yet, we still co-exist with each other in chaotic harmony. Good luck stepping up to Silver with some of these crowds.
So, without further ado, why don’t we take a look at the different types of League players that you may or may not wish you got stuck with on your Provisional games, shall we?
10. The Honorable One
"You haven't fully achieved this type unless you got these badges!"
Ranks Most Associated With: All Ranks
Yes, we’re gonna start on a good note. Deal with it. These are the type of players that you’d really, really wish that would get paired with you on your Series and/or Provisionals. But the sad truth is that there’s just about the same chance to get these players as a chance of a single bacterium surviving those commercial anti-bacterial soaps.
But don’t worry, 0.01% isn’t that small of a number if you just believe in yourself!
These are the well-mannered and well-skilled players that just make you want to hit that Honor button and maybe even the report button because you just want to relay how great they are to Riot. Don’t worry, they won’t get banned! (Like other people *ehem* number 4 *ehem*)
Not much to say here, the chances of coming across these people these days are very slim. But don’t let that stop you from trying, though!
9. The Stagnant Season Veteran
"The Holy Grails of Season I. Respectable, yet not that intimidating if it's Bronze."
Ranks Most Associated With: Bronze - Diamond
These are the douche players who think they know what they’re doing just because they’ve played League since the early ages of it. They brag about how they’ve played through multiple seasons, yet they still are able to amaze us by not moving a spot from their divisions.
Players like these need to grow up. Being somewhat more experienced in the field doesn’t really make them better than the newer players. You may have been able to see Faker win the Season 3 Championship or have witnessed HotshotGG at his prime but that doesn’t mean jack. It’s an evolving game and your skills have to evolve with it.
But hey, it’s still a great thought to think about how a player remained so inadequate and incompetent for years straight.
If you also try to counter their logic (pun definitely intended), you’re gonna have a hard time.
8. The Girl “Gamer”
"I really can't find any pictures to depict Girl Gamers without being hunted down by their fans, so let Team Siren handle this."
Ranks Most Associated With: All Ranks, most notably Silver-Platinum.
Not being totally sexist, but some gamer girls are just really, really annoying. These are the players that tell you they’re a girl once they’re losing to earn sympathy. If they’re on the opposing team and get totally dominating, they’d say they’re a girl and berate you too. But most of the time they’re just poking fun at hookup trolls who want a piece of that girl gamer cake.
You’ll see these girls everywhere in Ranked. And to be perfectly clear, this does not represent every gamer girl. There are only legit gamers, boy or girl, it doesn’t matter. (These are females who broadcast themselves in chat to be girls so that desperate teenage League boys put them up on a pedestal and worship them). It’s as if they just couldn’t get enough of the attention.
Some even reach up to Challenger. Perks of having a short-term boyfriend who’s high-ELO, I guess. But we’re not here to judge (on the other hand, we totally are).
7. The eSports Fanatic
"The Mid-lane God that everybody worships. Bow down before Faker-senpai!"
Ranks Most Associated With: Silver – Challenger
For those of you who are Bronze and think that you should be here, reconsider having that SKT tag on your name first. That tag doesn’t count, and there’s no way in heaven you’ll ever be Faker in Bronze, so try moving up a division or go to hell.
These are the players who you’d likely see with a club tag of their supported team on their names. Obviously, there are gonna be some bandwagon members, but let’s filter them out of here as they have no place in LoL other than Bronze division. eSports fanatics are, more often than not, just dreamers who want to get better at playing LoL
Usually in high ranks, some players tend to imitate their idols’ moves, such as Dopa, Gosu, Bubba Kush, etc. It’s also done in lower ranks, but the skills shown down there are also the main source of the Youtube montage of Wood Division Adventures.
These are usually also the players who buy every commemorative Seasonal skin by Worlds champions. SKT’s new set of Champion skins are going to be released, so we’ll see a fresh batch of dreamers who feel that they’re Faker when it does.
6. The Couples
"Couple gamers in their natural habitat. Please don't feed the couples."
Ranks Most Associated With: All Ranks
These are the players who just make you want to smash your head onto your keyboard. They aren’t completely toxic, but they are nauseous to every single League player alive because they’re too disgusting for a single, loveless person.
Couples have developed a habit of creating creative usernames that match, usually a “His” or “Her” prefix on their names that’s both very creative and an eyesore for single people. Couples tend to go Bot-lane together, which could go either of two ways: They either develop synergy and carry, or they both suck and intentionally throw the whole game altogether.
It’s usually the latter, but wouldn’t it be nice to have a “Her” someday? Win or lose, that’d probably be fun.
5. The Smurf
"Yeahp, this is actually a legit business in LoL as it's completely not against the rules."
Ranks Most Associated With: Unranked, Low Ranks
Smurf is just the League lingo for a guy who basically created another separate account.
Smurfing is a very popular loophole of LoL. These are the people who create new accounts so that they may beat less experienced players who are not in their skill level. Why do people do this you may ask? So that they can feel better about themselves, of course, what else would unskilled bastards do?
It’s also fairly certain that sometimes players just do it out of boredom. They try to recreate those glory days and euphoric means of leveling up when they were just starting out. I mean, that’s why I created mine. It’s a great way to remind you how you started and how you’ve grown since then.
Usually, Smurfs are generally lower-ranked accounts than the Smurf’s main account. But if one is Bronze V, they more often than not ditch that account for the Smurf. Who could blame them?
Smurfing is also a great cool down should one be tilting on their Ranked games. Yet it’s still a bad practice as it brings imbalance to the new players of League. But I guess they just have to learn the hard way.
4. The Intentional Trolls (aka TITs)
"Picking Graves isn't a troll move, but hey, losing with an OP champ is just as much."
Ranks Most Associated With: Unranked, Bronze to Master
We’re here now, to an evil of League that's almost inhumane, disgusting, and purely annoying. These are the infamous players who throw games on purpose just for the sake of the whole team losing. What’s even worse? They do it in Ranked games.
The main reasons for doing so are completely at random, up to the troll, and even in some cases are just unknown. But anyway, it’s a complete dick move and it’s supposed to be a ban-able offense. But to everybody’s relief, TITs are growing smaller in numbers thanks to Riot’s strict implementations.
However, any player may be ticked off into becoming these bastards. So always be careful and be nice to every teammate, unless you want to lose. Remember what the guide says: “Players who harass their teammate after a mistake lose 15% more games.” Well, maybe not exactly that, but you get the point.
3. The “Laggers”
"RIP-perino, Darius. You've served Noxus long enough. Death by Lag pls"
Ranks Most Associated With: All Ranks; more practiced by lower ranks.
These are the types of players that pretend to be lagging to hide the fact that they just made a mistake or just plain suck. This happens on every rank, including Challenger. It’s okay to make mistakes, but here in LoL, one mistake could lead to a Nexus Turret going down in mere seconds.
“What they don’t know won’t hurt them and my pride”. That’s the motto of these guys. Instead of learning from the mistake, they’ll put the blame on lag. Even though it never lagged, they’ll always choose to blame another player and/or circumstance other than themselves. This is why this happens more on the low ranks.
Not being able to admit you made a grave mistake and improving from that mistake is not a trait for an aspiring high-ELO player. This may happen on Challenger sometimes, but there, it’s really pride on the line as they’re always expected to be the best-of-the-best. It’s sad if you think about it, there’s so much pressure to keep that Top 200 spot alive.
Anyway, back to the point. Sometimes, players are indeed absorbed in lag because of their slow-ass internet. This causes them to not play well and even lead to throwing as a result of the lag. Remember kids, if you know you’re lagging, don’t play Ranked. You’ll ruin it for everybody.
2. The "Noob" Skinners
"Some players really need to improve on their skills rather than use skins. Credits to 9gag!"
Ranks Most Associated With: All Ranks
These are the players who just have too much money on their wallets. Hence, they spend it on RP and different skins that they don’t even need. But that’s not the whole essence of a skinner.
Skinners are those who have skins for their champions, yet they suck at playing the champion, haven’t even played the champion once, or they just get thrashed while wearing an expensive skin. It’s really such a shame, though. For example, to see a Pulsefire Ezreal just losing, It’s just a shame to see all that money put to waste. Note that Pulsefire Ezreal is $25 alone.
Players are dubbed as skinners once they established a feeding program all on their own, despite having an awesome skin. People these days forget that skins aren’t just for aesthetic pleasure, it shows that you have somewhat mastered the champion. If you get caught losing with a skin, prepare to be dubbed a skinner!
1. The Kids
"This kid accurately represents all the crybaby kids playing League."
Ranks Most Associated With: Unranked – Diamond
Alright, we’ve reached the end of our list. For the last type, it’s the most populated type of player there is, the Kids. Infamous and rampant, these type of players are always online (at least until it’s past their bedtime) and they’re always going to be in one of your daily games.
Kids in Ranked games don’t have to be necessarily a real-life kid. More often than not, young adults or teens are also closely following their footsteps when it comes to their toxicity. Like the wise Atticus Finch once said: “I believe, at one point, we were all kids once”. Again, I’m not good with quotes, but you get the idea.
Being a kid is essentially just being extremely immature, extremely irrational, and extremely unskilled. Yet they have the gall to flame out everybody and are willing to go AFK and intentionally throw the game just so they may get revenge. Sounds familiar? Every League player has come across these little assholes.
We don’t have to go into detail to explain how kids are kids in League. It’s kind of self-explanatory. But take note that this plague only happens up until Diamond. Think of kids as training weights to success. They’re not certainly helpful to you and your team, but they’re definitely of some help to your carrying skills.
There’s a reason why the number of kids you’ll meet will gradually lessen while you move up, as they’re just training for the big leagues. Take your ticket, don’t blow your gasket. If you feel that hanging out with the kid leagues isn’t for you, adapt and get some Challenger skills. Don’t cuss your whole team out and cry like one. Be like #10, if you still remember what the 10th type is.
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What about you? Did you fit in any of the types here in our article? Feel free to leave an awesome comment at our awesome comments section below!
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